my journey

Satya Sai baba died :(

2011-04-26T11:30:00.000-07:00

So some holy saint died couple of days back for which the whole country is filled with grief and sorrow.Fine! that is their faith regardless of how hollow or strong it is.India is democratic country,we are free to choose our religion,our God.. bla bla.All big talks.
Few years back Taslima Nasreen was thrown out of her country like a stray dog.sorry bitch.Her fault was that she said something against a God and then India gave her shelter.Fine.Some people say that Allah and Jesus both comes under this very own baba.Even that is fine.No Offense still.(I don't expect anything wiser than this from the people whose expectation from God are just some sorcerers tricks).Now Narendra Modi is one of the great follower of baba (remember how eager he was to give shelter to Nasreen against some extreme muslims of bangaladesh).Lately Nasreen was found slamming this baba and the people who followed him.
Moral of the story is i would live to see the reaction of Modi on this..

Exploitation

2011-01-28T11:32:00.000-08:00

Now i come to know the pros and cons of working in an IT company.Earlier i used to think lavish lifestyle,lucrative salary and glamour are the essence of this industry but forgot to think about the other side of the coin which is nothing but the harsh reality.I started my work in this project with lots of enthusiasm which never seemed to cease out.I worked really hard because of which i am really proud of myself.I worked on the whole project right from the beginning till the end and made it working.Believe my guys that was an incredible task by a fresher coming from a Non CS background.However my boss just fail to acknowledge this effort "officially".Just because some bloody idiot has made some obscure rules for this rating system.You cannot award all the guys in a team with rating 4.Others in my team seems like either they were denied by the whole world or have decided to live in austerity.They work like hell.The irony is that even boss recognize me of my indefatigable effort but not officially.After working for 12-14 hrs daily and not even getting reward for it is really demoralizing.No man i am not crying but i am just searching a good reason to run away from this jungle.

2010-12-11T01:05:00.000-08:00

When my friends tell me that you are changed i don't know in what respect they say like that.My childhood friends who saw me 8-9 years before, they are of the opinion that now i am much mature and talk much wisely and that is quite obvious.Why the hell they ask such questions.Can't they see that a person has been transformed from a boy to a man after he gets a job.Why they expect that the person will still sit till late night and involved in a conversation which takes you nowhere.Why they expect he will still not be ashamed in discussing about the figure of the best girl seen on that day.Yes friends i am talking about the change that we all experience when we get the job.If the person is not experiencing change he has just wasted his time.This is in the same way that an old person wishing to be as young as 30 years before.What about so many years of experience and knowledge he has gained in the last 30 years.

My unforgettable days

2010-06-18T08:04:00.000-07:00

I came outside all alone at 7.00 'o clock in the morning.I was trying to reach office which was the most difficult thing i was going to do after a long time.My training got extended by 15 days because i didnt perform well in the first time.Till then i had always been accompanied by hussain in the morning but on that day he had to go to a new office.I was left all alone.I went to the same canteen for breakfast but it was not the same one.No acquaintance was there.All new faces .Believe me it was such a detestable part of the training that i never wants to remove this from my chapter of life because it has shown me to face new challenges,to believe on two most important words 'i can' and to work hard.Now i am out of this but i cant forget these most ordeal days of my life.Someone said it right "the darkest moment of the night is just before the dawn".

fed up of this training

2010-05-18T05:05:00.000-07:00

I have never been so eager to work. fed up of all these classes and exams,i feel like singing a song "we dont need no education".Telling you truth this is completely destroying my abilities.Instead of nurturing my superb brain and honing my talent,it made me a clumsy,lazy,useless sloth.The first thing which comes to my mind when i reach office is sleep.Oh God i dont know when this will get over. i want it ASAP.

prodigal

2010-05-03T06:41:00.000-07:00

So i got my first salary in this job after a long time(2 months).What a relief was that. but then many things came into my mind.My shoes were creaked out,i am running short of pants etc.Suddenly the effect of the sun seems to increased by almost double and whole of my skin is getting tan.Then suddenly i realised about my odour,eye protection etc.So epitomizing all of this i spent around 3000 Rs.Oh shit!! buddy what i did .I thought this time i would save money but then i saw my my room partner who spent around 10000 Rs for nothing.hahahaha.he doesn't know that he is a fool.

depression

2010-04-17T02:15:00.000-07:00

well,i still remember my days when i was in amu.so good and joyous were the days that there was not a single hint of tension.i still miss that period.That was not like utopia. i had many of my friends who where so depressed and pessimist that i always used to wonder that how they could be like that.
Now things are changed.I can feel the immense pressure a mind can handle.i can understand the problem with the people who used to commute daily from this place to that.i dont know why such things are coming to my mind but yes i can feel the pain.Its beautiful.After a long time i am feeling this.
All great personalities had depression but this doesn't define them,the quality is how they handle them.Abraham lincoln was a great man.His power to overcome with the depression was extraordinary.On the contrary,Van gogh, the famous painter was unable to handle that and committed suicide.We can understand that temptation that makes a person to do such henious crime like suicide.Virginia woolf had committed suicide we all know but the way she did that was very uncommon.She filled her pockets with heavy stones and drowned herself.Some people became popular just because they committed suicide example kurt cobain.For the people who wants beauty,the condition of marlyn monroe was pathetic at the time of death.
So if you are feeling that kind of pain,feel it as much as you can.This is one of the best pain of the world.Don't try to avoid that.Keep it as your shadow.This will help you in your near future.

new life

2010-03-08T11:46:00.000-08:00

So i am back to my school.No its not like i again joined school,its life in tcs.Guys need some thums-up or need to consult salman khan who can suggest them to grow up.Yes its a crap to see them behaving like children when they are in the biggest IT industry of india.However even tcs is leaving no effort to believe us that we are still children.Gates are locked after we enter the office.We cant go out of campus.Nobody can smoke and the biggest part is we can't even use our phone.Its not frustating but quite funny.

tring tring

2009-06-17T02:36:00.001-07:00

Tring Tring…………

Tring Tring………….

Me:hello

Salman:assalamwalaikum bhai

Me:walaikum assalam,how r u?

Salman : I am gud,what about you?whats going on?

Me: hey cmon man what r u asking? You know it well whats going on,its as simple as taking a bath in summer ,nothing.yaar life sucks now.Nothing seems to conciliatory right now.few complaisant words from the family are just useless to assuage this idleness feeling.

Salman:ain’t you preparing for the psu’s?

Me: Ofcourse I am trying but the tension of the results refrain me to concentrate.

Salman : you lost your mind or something,you are phattoo.nobody is going to get failed in the final year n that too in our department.

Me : n if that happen?

Salman :then you r gonna make the record.hahahahaha

Me: you bugger.

Salman : I am but u are bigger.forget it. what about the call?

Me : those assholes have forgotten that they had recruited few guys .

Salman :still yaar you have the job .so now what r u thinking?

Me : thinking how to thrash the guys who calls me daily n sceptually ask me about my condition.they themselves are depressed n causing me also.So do you have any ideas?

Salman :acha chal catch u later,khuda hafiz.

short story

2009-06-17T02:17:00.001-07:00

Salim was a simple ardous student who was doing his graduation in maths.His family was not one of those affluent family but his parents never let the money became his impedence for the studies.In his leasure time he used to give tution to the younger pupils by which he was able to produce some money for his domestic needs.He never asked for money from his parents.He studied in a university which was quite far from his place so he could not go to his place very often.Last time he went to his house was the summer holidays and the next holidays were in eid festival which was then a month far.
Salim had two sisters and a brother among his siblings.His sisters were still in primary school while his brother had passed his high school with the flying colours.He stood first in the school. Salim being eldest brother thought to give some prize to his brother to encourage him. He had been captivated from a long time by the Loungenes new wrist watch launched in the market. Its price was Rs6000/- while he had only 4000Rs left with him. Nevermind he thought to himself. He would ask from his pupil for an advance of 1000Rs.
Day has arrived when he had to go to his home.He took a long bath and shaved himself nicely. He always wanted to pretend that there was no problem and he was fully fine in the hostel.It almost took a night in the journey.In the dawn when he reached home everyone was very excited.He sat among them then took a tea ,offered namaz and went to sleep.He was very tired by the journey.
Salim’s parents always felt proud of him.They always used to give lectures to his younger brother to become like him.Even if his brother did something very good they minified him by exaggerating salim’s achievement infront of him.Though he loved his elder brother very much but was quite relived when salim went out to study further. Salim’s sisters were too young to be compared.
When Salim was sleeping his sisters were rummaging his bag.They found many interesting things .A beautiful hair band,a pencil box and a beautifull wrist watch.The names were written on the respective items.However the tag of the wrist watch was fallen somewhere.They took the items and ran to show their parents.They also took a watch and told their parent “See how beautiful this watch is ammi”.His brother was also standing and he jumped to see that watch.He asked from his sister “This is for me?” She replied “I don’t know there was no tag on it.May be this is for himself”.On hearing this he returned the watch back.His mother said “when you will study hard like your brother these things will no longer be a dream.”She turned back and continued preparing a delicious recipe for her son.His brother at one time looked the food and then the watch.He went to the room and searched his bag.There was nothing.He sat there on the chair and thought for a long time.
After about an hour when Salim woke up he thought to distribute the gifts to his siblings.When he entered the room he was taken aback . His new watch his burning in the fire with the cracking sound.His brother was standing dumb with the tag lying on the floor “For my most lovable brother who surpassed all my achievements and stood first”.

CAN EARTH SUSTAIN THIS SON OF A BITCH

2009-05-26T13:57:00.000-07:00

CAN EARTH SUSTAIN THIS SON OF A BITCH?
Well I don’t want to write this kind of blog but I am helpless. Someone said that pen is mightier than sword. Lets see whether this computer writing is even more mighty than pen or not. Its been a great pleasure to live in Aligarh, to spend this wonderful 4 years. But these things were till the last day when we had to submit the the final year project report which is mandatory part of engineering. This is the license of our B.TECH Degree. Everything was fine till a couple of days before submitting the report. I along with my project partner edited the report except for acknowledgement, certificate and references which I left for us to complete next day. However when I went to this ass licker’s room next day he was licking his ass. He said that he had given the repot for printing and binding and I needed to take no tension about that. On the next day this mother fucker, donkey raping shitty vanished. Cocksucker’s room was locked. On the final day 5 minutes before viva-voce I was shown my report.It was a hell for me. On the certificate he just mentioned his own name,in acknowledgement part he had written everything in the first person i.e “I”. The irony was he himself said in the last part “I deeply thank (his own name) “cock sucker” who really worked hard in preparing this report”. Now what to do. Nothing . Story doesn’t ends up here. This blasphemous incharitable stinking dog(piss on his face),said to the external examiner that only he had put effort in this project. The rest of the Guys were useless. Anyway the examiner was good so he was only concerned with the answers he got from us which were fine. But now you decide what to do with this motherfucker. I am sorry I have used some offensive words but if you would be in my place you couldn’t help yourself in thrashing this Bastard.

LAST TANGO IN ALIGARH

2009-05-21T07:58:00.000-07:00

LAST TANGO IN ALIGARH
So just 15 days are left. I am leaving this place. I don’t know whether I’ll be back or not. So what do you think ? Am I supposed to sing a song in grief? Or shall I sing a john denver “leaving on a jet plane” and become a mendicant for a hug from hmm…..i don’t know may be from chotu chai waala.The conditions were quite different during the inception time. I was supposed to live among the students of all fields B.A,B.Sc,Phd,LLB etc. Coming from a decent school I thought myself a little different. Escaping from ragging and lingering whole night at the medical’s canteen was a common thing. I realized later “jaisa des waisa bhes”. So what if I started sitting on a dhaba till late night doing nothing,What if even I started fantasizing a moustache bound girl who stood nowhere in my criteria for girls,what if I started roaming “amir nishan” market meant mainly for girls,getting completely bored and saying “I love this place”,what if I started going to cinema sitting on the front seat and enjoying the films. I was not like that. I thought myself as the most disciplined type of guy I have ever seen.But telling you one thing very frankly I love this place.why? because the comfort which you get here is inexplicable.The beauty of this place is the mesmerizing sleep for which I can sacrifice all of my other good habits.I can hug each and every ado which I despised earlier.The comfort here is just like your beautiful,lovable girlfriend for whom you are even ready to fight with your parents ,ignoring all her vices.I also lived in a dilapidated building supposing that as my hostel room,ate the bullet proof bread and thanking God for the chilled water which I could get only in dining hall.But its true It didn’t effect me at all.I love Aligarh and I love this university.It really made me rough and tough.

who is john galt?

2009-03-29T05:32:00.000-07:00

“WHO IS JOHN GALT ?”
Yesterday I finished reading Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand. The book is a voluminous 1200 page consisting more of her philosophies rather than story. It was my second book of ayn rand after the fountain head. The epitome of both the books are almost similar. However its not a lie that people call this book as her masterpiece. It deserve this title. It has a very fine conglomeration of her philosophy with the fictional story. It has a very good suspense, plot and heroism that is enough to fill a juvenile heart with lots of enthusiasm to work, sanguinity to face ordeal situation and wit to defend themselves.
The book start with the very famous slang “who is john galt?” which is used in almost every chapter. Everyone used that sentence when they found the present situation, uncontrollable but none of them could discern what really that sentence meant to be. John galt seemed to be either the creator of every problem or the saviour. But the million dollar question was “who is john galt?”.No one was sure whether he really existed or was some imaginary man. The jist of the novel is what would happen if great minds who only believed in their minds and deligence get vanished from the earth. Is egoist attitude a problem or a solution of everything .Is money the root of all evil?
In this book author has shown what made a real music composer to disappear on the night of his most awaited show. What made a most extraordinary mind turned out to be a depraved, worthless playboy, What made an intelligent, deligent son of a bishop turned out to be a most dangerous looter. What made an owner of the biggest oil field of US burned his oil well and disappeared .The answer of all these questions is “who is john galt ?”.
Ayn Rand in both of her novels shown that there is no shortcuts to success except for work. Work is the only thing which is to be worshipped. There is nothing for a man in this world than work. No relationship can replace his profession. No love is more sacred than the love for the work. This attitude makes the common man to think that the person is selfish. That what Ayn rand wanted o tell. Be a selfish .Do the things very faithfully for yourself and you would do a great work for the mankind unintentionally. Thus Selfishness is not a vice ,it’s a vitue. In the novel she also condemned the communism and told the people that work of government is only to protect the people and not to interfere in their progress.

KATARNIA GHAT SANCTUARY

2009-02-04T00:00:00.000-08:00

Katarnia ghat sanctuary is situated at the Nepal-india border in the behraich district of uttar Pradesh. It was long time back when my father was posted their and I was about 12 years of age. Away from all kinds of banal world it lies in the lap of nature which is still unexplored. Surrounded by a thick evergreen forest of about 40 sq Km which contains every kind of flora and fauna.The best season to visit is winter when you get up from the bed and hear morning hymn by the beautiful migratory birds and when you try to catch them they just disssappear somewhere in the fog. Amidst the green trees a clean colony could be seen where we used to live. when the charm of the scene leave you spellbound you see a man walking far away which help you to realise that this is paradise on earth and the magnanimity of the Goddess Gaea is at its zenith.The best thing to do is just sitting in the lap of nature and feeling the beauty of it.(believe me you’ll feel that).Dusk comes a bit early in the evening which could again drive you crazy.This is the lonelines where we get peace ,which assuage all our mental pain and rejuvenate us for this world of harsh reality.Thus ending this with an admonishing sentence that beware of wild animals specially in the night as everything is real there.

PRAYING HANDS

2009-01-25T23:01:00.000-08:00

PRAYING HANDS

Years ago Durers were the two siblings
They both wanted to pursue careers in paintings
However the plan of God was a bit different
Their family was not one of those affluent.

So they carefully planned their careers
But the fees were their real barriers.
They decided that one at a time would go to school
The other one would work for him to succor.

The coin was tossed albretch won
Albert lost and was remained alone.
He worked in a mine to support his brother
Albretch learnt painting but internally suffered

After an ordeal time of four year albretch returned,
Everyone was happy while he was waiting for albert’s turn.
Albert threw a party where everyone gathered,
They were happy by the albretch’s work.

Suddenly the albretch stood and told their story,
Everyone heared and praised their grit in difficulty,
As a true gentleman albretch raised a toast
He knew he had a favour to boast.

He said “brother now this is the time
You have to go to school and to pursue your goal
I’ll help you as you did to mine
Which will make you the best painter of all time.”

Albert raised and said with the tears in eyes
“no brother no even if I want I can’t
I have lost my hand , working in the mine
With the other one I can only pray for our good time ”

He didn’t know how to repay his brother
By which he could be obliged further
He then painted his masterpiece with all he crammed
Which is then named as the praying hands.

2009-01-19T05:08:00.000-08:00

FILMY CHAKKAR
We see lots of films.Sometimes we prefer comlete family films while sometimes its comedy. Teenagers fantacize themselves as one of the strongest character of the films.Not only teenagers but fully grown man entrapped in the worst fucking problem of life prefer to live a life of cinderalla but at the end it’s the life of harsh realities that we all have to face.For many people films are the motivating factors for success in looks,business,games etc.
Couple of days ago one of my friend asked me that “If God gives you chance to live a life of film actor , whom would you prefer?”
I gave a good thought and told him its brad pitt.He then rectified me and said “no it’s a character not the actor himself.for eg the Godfather played by marlan brando or Alpachino,maverick of topgun,cornel of scent of a woman etc”.oh! that was difficult.i took a long time and thought about many of favourite characters.Is it superman who can fly anywhere and the strongest man on the earth or batman who is not only a strong man but also rich business tycoon.or is it of mission imposible,but rummaging in the whole box of my filmy knowledge,I had choosen a woman.Neglecting for a while the physical appearance of woman and speaking about the nature I like the character of marla singer in fightclub ,the most.Her frivolous and careless nature faticizes me always.Actually she had guts to say no to the orthodox things which usually the people do and which they don’t want to do.she had an attitude which says fuck you if you don’t like it,I’ll do what I feel good.Never hesitant on being a tyro and this is what extra sanguinity which I liked in her character.she never wanted to worry about a thing .Never wasting time in breaking rules. “want to exchange numbers,this is mine whats yours?”, “want to have sex ,my place or yours?”.No she was not a whore but she was free. Also she never pretense herself into something else. Remember when police raided her house when she was with tylor durden ,while running what informations she was giving to police: that the woman who lives there is slut,bitch etc.SHE DEFINITELY KNOWS WHAT SHE IS.

Biggest Tharki

2009-01-12T06:49:00.000-08:00

When I entered the class I got a stroke of depression.Neither the class was boring nor the teachers were frustrating(not so much).It was the couple of guys who were responsible for that.The two guys of the same type always refrain me to attend the class.The first one is really one of those pachyderm animal who never feels anything.I,me and myself are the keywords.The most detestable person of the class.He is really an insane.At one time he would keep you on the heaven,the other day he would make your life hell.He is damn irritating.The other one is bigger than this.you couldn’t even walk with him and believe me if u do that all time you would pray that u meet no acquaintance.otherwise you would only get embarrassment.He neither knows to walk,to behave,to talk,nothing.No don’t think I am telling this as if am having some grudges against him.This opinion is 100%yes in common poll.They both have lots of similarities and the funniest part is when they both fight with each other.o my God how would I spend these days,no, how I spent my days with them.They both are sexually frustrated.They both desperately wants women.I didn’t know the correct word to describe them but thanks to last year’s bollywood film,’bheja fry’.They are the biggest “tharki” in the college,EROTOMANIAC.

2008-11-22T03:26:00.001-08:00

COLT’S CHASE
My father was black and my mother was white
So that all made me the colour of nineteen ‘o five.
Few people said my legs were beautiful
While few said I have a future fruitfull
My dreams were not so big,
I just wanted to be a big.
I was of five who didn’t know the meaning of life
I didn’t know about my father ,my mother was no more.
One fine day I heard my master
He was saying to his child about his master
I was paying no heed to them
But he said something what I dreamt
It was the question ’ who is big?’
The answer expectedly was not of the myth
He told him the big is the one
Who can decide the destiny of many at once.
What was that ?I searched for long
Answers were not the same which I want.
One day I have broken few rules
I ran away from them and made them fools
I have not done something obscurely
My master was peevish & was surely
Their endevours were not upto the mark
I was fully free standing infront of the park

I came to the green field,
I stayed for long without any meal
The pathetic was my condition
Still I haven’t got the answer of my question.
Few told me it’s a fireball
Which breaks our dream and prevents us from fall
While few told me it’s a snow ball
Which we daily see after the fireball.
But neither the sun nor the moon were God
Somebody please tell me the answer of my what.

I then heared the shout of crowds
I thought something interesting without any doubt
I ran delirously towards that
I didn’t get what was that.

Few were shouting on the creatures like me
They were running in a big field.
As they finished I observed the behaviour
Emotions were mixed which was rare.

Some were shouting that they were ruined
While some were so happy that they have no brains
People called that a horse race
I made it a dream to be chased
I have got my answer
I have got my God
That was the thing I had been searching
That was the thing which decides the future of all.

PAPER BOAT IN THE BROOK

2008-10-08T13:04:00.001-07:00

Paper boat in the brook
Keep it sailing,Keep it moving ,
Oh God! Keep them smiling.
Its speed is the bliss of the people who see it,
Its stoppage is the grief of the people who comprehend it.

It is an exemplary behaviour
For the lifes without any destiny,
Keep on moving till the nature carries you
For the people who have this mentality.

It is an example of the real optimist
Who have the reasons to complain
But always chooses to smile.

O foolish people ! o foolish people
Never think your life meaningless.
It has the meaning like the small boat in the brook,
Who have no destiny but still is the rapture of urchins.

O MY INDIA

2008-10-08T12:52:00.000-07:00

O MY INDIA
The golden bird was caught in the cage
With the pain and the master’s rage,
He gave it the food to eat ,the wine to drink,
But it hardly gets the time to blink.

Then it needed an ultimate freedom,
“Do or Die” was its slogan .
In the mean time its baby was born
It also had the same demand.

At last the heaven opened its door,
Freedom was lying on their floor.
They were taught the rules to fly,
But there was still doubt in the high sky.

The bird also came in the sky’s rhythm ,
To compete with the vultures and the eagle
Pinned with the one ,crashed with the other,
There was always a pandemonium in the weather.

Humans tried to catch them again,
They made them fool by their brains.
Sometimes begged from their colleague,
There was always a crisis for their feed.

They became weak extremely weak,
When they themselves fight with their beaks
Now they starve for the days,
The condition was merciful not for the rage.

Eagle please stop them to fight ,
Tell them both the ways to fly,
Worse is that even eagle breaks the rules to fly,
Then may God come a bit lower in the sky.